Its that time again

Well, almost anyway. I'm thinking of NFL football season, which preseason starts next week. Gotta watch those detroit lions lose, what else is there to do when they play? Must mock the team, haven't been able to say much good about them in years.

NASCAR season is over half over. And I think the NHRA season is over half over, or somewhere around there. So all that will be left is football. At least for a couple of months between november and next february.

Won't be too much longer the new season premieres will start for all the good shows. And all the bad ones too. And wondering if any of the new shows they will come out with this season will be worth watching. There isn't really that much i watch any more anyway.

Yesterday I ordered a book on fantasy cartooning. Should get it sometime next week. Hopefully it will give me some new inspiration. I've checked out a few sketch blogs and artist sights looking for some inspiration and I have gotten some, but still haven't put pencil to paper as of yet. I should get off of here and do that for a bit before I crawl into bed. Since its almost 1:00 a.m. already. Didn't think I had been on here that long.

Sometimes I remember........

Day after day, more often than not, I am remind somehow of why i hate people. Today was no exception. I was even told to punch out and go home early, not that there was much left to do anyway, just for saying goodbye to my best friend when she was leaving. Lets just say the bullshit was really deep today. I don't feel like thinking of the details or i'll just want to beat somebody senseless, but there are too many to choose from.

I thought a few times again of just walking out. And I sure wish I could figure out a way to not go back next week. But, if I have too then well, lets just say I made a promise to my friend once to be nice, but I don't think I can hold that promise much longer. They think they know me, but they know nothing.

Why do some people have to be so damn stupid. They believe what everyone else tells them, or they take whatever someone says and twist it all around so it sounds like what they want to hear. Those are the kind of people that make me want to .........well, i'm not sure what i'd want to do, but it probably wouldn't be pretty.

A friend gave me a shirt the other day. Its a perfect shirt for that place and i'll probably wear it if I go back monday. It says "I don't get paid enough to kiss your ass". I like that shirt.

If it wasn't for all the bills I probably would have walked off that job a long time ago. I would so like to forget that place even exists. The only good thing to come out of the time I have been there was meeting my best friend. Other than that the place is worthless, as are most of the people. Some of them I wouldn't consider any more than I would the dirt on the bottom of my shoe.

I was writing little notes in my notebook I sometimes carry and most of them were like "Who tops the list of those that should be skinned alive" (Too many to list there) Or "Smile....you'll be dead soon". Little happy thoughts like that.

Shaggy

Lunch and hot rods

The only good thing about today was going to lucnh with my best friend. I like going to lunch with her, and not just for the conversation. Most of the time i go to lunch with anybody I may see one nice car if any at all. But sometimes when I go with her, especially if we go to Wendy's for lunch we'll see three or four cars. And today was no exception. Three of them I am not sure what they were at the moment, but before we left to go back to work we saw a '55 chevy. It had some faded spots in the paint and needed some work, but it still looked good.

Last year, or maybe the year before, there was a BMW motorcycle gathering up north somewhere in the state, but I don't remember where. And while we sat at our usual table that day we saw about 50 motorcycles go by. That was cool too.

I also got to see my friend's oldest daughter today, hard to believe she will be 17 in September. Which I have not got to do in a while. So it was nice to talk to her for a few minutes outside the hobby shop when I went there after work. It will be 7 years in Sept. that I have known the five of them, and it doesn't really seem like its been that long.

Shaggy

Too early!!!

Well, for some reason unknown to me, I didn't crawl into bed until about 4;00 a.m. this morning. I just wasn't tired. I finished watching drag racing, got on here for almost two hours, and then about 2:30 was setting in my chair reading a book. At 3:00 I decided to turn on the TV and watch Daria cartoons. Then I finally went to bed.

And woke up before 7:00. So now I sit here hoping I can stay awake at work today. Not that that really matters or anything. So, I guess I won't think on that any more.

Shaggy

Finally

Woke up about 5:00 a.m. this morning tho the sound of thunder. It stormed until about just after 9:00 and stopped long enough for me to go buy some food. As soon as i got back it stormed again for another 30 minutes or so. And now the sun is shining and its supposed to get hot again this afternoon.

Here I am....part 3

The dirty and somewhat useless little river just outside of town. Thats the antenna from my truck sticking up there, I took all these shots from my truck.

Here I am...part 2

Another shot not far from the first, maybe another mile or so

Here I am

This is a shot from about a mile out of town

Writing

I like to write, but more often than not, I don't put pen to paper. I used to write short stories, but I haven't done that in years, even though I had always thought I wanted to write the best horror story ever done. I have written a few poems over the years, some good and some not so good. I have even written a few that have brought a tear to a friend's eye. Which is a hard thing to do.

I sometimes carry a small pocket sized note pad with me, so if inspiration strikes I can jot something down. Yesterday I filled two of the pages with nothing but little one liners. Maybe two lines at most. But nothing really that great.

I used to be able to think up all sorts of fantastic and scary things. My mind uused to wander, and wonder, at many things and it was always filled with something new. Nowadays I can't seem to get past thoughts of where i am or people I have to deal with most of the week. The other noght I tried to think of something really bloody and scary, but kept going back to thoughts of setting at the picnic table at work listening to most of those people rant on about useless bullshit.

Two weeks ago I wrote a poem for my best friend. She requested one about souls. Took me three days to think of something. I had the first line and the last two lines written down before I thought of what would go between them. It was probably the best thing I have written in a long long time. And she loved it.

The one thing I like about writing is that I can take the time to think of what I want to say before I actual put thoughts down on paper. A lot of times when I am talking face to face with someone I can think of what I want to say over and over before I open my mouth. But then it still comes out wrong. Or it may come out right, but the emotion or whatever that I want to express does not come off the way I wish it too. If that makes any sense.

Shaggy

Horoscopes

I usually don't read horoscopes, as they are generally only worth a quick laugh. As I am still waiting for "all the money" that I was supposed to get at least three or for times. The last couple horoscopes I read in the tv guide said I should give up on the illusion, whatever the hell that means, and to give up most of my friends and become even more private than I already am. I did give that one some thought. I tried to think of how many people I would put on a list of friends. Well, besides my best friend and her kids and a very few people I have met online, the rest of the people on this rock I could care less about. I didn't include family in that thought because they are family, not that I really talk to that many in the family anyway.........

The idea came up the other day about trust. My best friend I would trust to know more about me than anyone, and she does. She is my friend, my sister, and my dark ange. A few other people I would trust to know what I would feel I could let them know about me. Most people I wouldn't trust to know my shoe size.

Some days I think how nice it would be to plant some stakes in the front yard with some heads on them....but that is illegal. And the neighbors might complain. Some days when I have to set and listen to somebody ramble on about what they think is important while giving a whole lot of double talk and bullshit and the same time, I think about how much they might scream if they were skinned alive. Or at least have their tongues ripped out of their heads. Not that I am a violent person mind you, but some days thinking of certain people having all sorts of tortures put upon their worthless bodies can be such happy thoughts indeed.

I have once again been called mean. I can deal with that. At times I have been called much worse. But thats okay too. Because maybe I am. To some people. I have also been told i'm nice, sweet, and truly kind. I read somewhere that one can never really know ones self without balance between their light and dark sides. Well, balanced or not, I simply am.

Shaggy

Still sore

Tonight I am still feeling some pain from when I was so sick last weekend. Sometimes I just want to cut myself off at the neck and throw away everything from there down. I may feel better that way, although it would be hard to get around. Or do much of anything else. I still say there is something screwed up in my gut, whether the doctors could see it with all their tests or not. Then again, most doctors are stupid.

Wasn't going to do a thing today, but rest. But, ended up going to Meijer this morning with ma and dad and got the color ink cartridge I have needed for my printer for the last month and a half. Thats a good thing. Didn't do much else today though. I did manage to set at the drawing table a couple of times, scribbled out one idea just to get it out of my head and then tossed it somewhere in the filing cabinet. Started working out a couple other ideas that may or may not turn out the way I want them too. Been doing more practice with the whole cartoony style thing I wanted, so thats good.

Watched Rides and Overhaulin tonight. I watch them once in a while. Chip Foose does some great stuff. They could overhaul my truck any time.

Shaggy

More heat and storms

Got up early this morning, and was awake at least three times last night. Went to town to get some groceries and stuff and got home just in time to get ready to go to work. I had thought of staying home because i'm still pretty sore after being sick, but went anyway. Took it pretty easy, even switched spots on the machine with one of the gals during the daily run so I didn't have to bend so much. About 1:30 I started feeling pretty sore and kept going until about 2:30 when I just said I got to go and left. We would have been done at 3:30 anyway and it was almost break time, so no biggee. Stopped at the bookstore on the way out, then went to the bank. That was a fun trip because just after I got home it started to storm, the rain wasn't bad on the way to the bank, but the stuff the traffic in the other lane was throwing up was a mess. Especially when a couple 18-wheelers went by and my wipers had to work to clean all that water off. Went to the store, picked up what was forgotten this morning and made it back home about the time that I would have just been getting into my truck to leave work.

I attempted to lay down after dinner and rest, but I just couldn't get comfortable. So, just going to relax in front of the tv for a while and flip through a couple magazines i got today. And tomorrow I don't have anything at all to do except rest.

Shaggy

Realizations and lost dreams

As I have had not much of anything to do but be sick this weekend, which maybe was not the flu but my screwed up gut getting blocked up again, i've had time to think on a few things. Figured out how most of what little drawing i have done lately has been for others.......not myself. Things I have written, like poems and such stuff, for others.....not myself. The dream of ever being with someone that could love a freak like me.....shot to hell. Maybe not. But not important at the moment. Having a little hope can be a good thing........when said hope has to do with never seeing most of these useless people around here ever again. Realizing that as boring as this town, this area, and the places I always end up around here being partly the reason my creative energy has gone by the wayside, i've given up thinking about such things and started getting back to letting the fantasies fill my head. That is working.....sort of. But that too must be given time to rebuild. Also being able to put words into thoughts that actually make sense takes time as well.

Watching drag racing in a little while is a good thing. And can't forget Family guy.

Shaggy

Better.....sort of

Well, I see my other message has either disappeared or hasn't been put up yet, even though its been about 7 hours since I typed it up. I'm not feeling as bad as I was, but still not the best. I had a couple more eggs for dinner and after about an hour I decided that eggs were not a good thing. Guess i'll have to stick with the popsicles. Even though the barbeque turkey sandwich I had for lunch set for a while. Still feeling some pain in my gut, but not as bad as that was either. I hate getting sick.

Shaggy

Been down for the count

Haven't been here in a while, didn't even get online at all thursday night or all of friday. I was so sick thursday night I was having flashbacks to how I felt before I ended up in the hospital that last time. Called the doctor on friday morning and they said I couldn't get in because they were soooo busy and I owed them too much already. Big help there. Then they tell me it sounds like the flu and to rest and take some immodium liquid and sip on some gatorade. I'm feeling somewhat better this morning, still having pains in my gut, but part of that could be because all I ate yesterday was a bite of toast and a popsicle. I had an egg for beakfast this morning, but that probably won't set too much longer. Flu? Maybe. But i've never had that much pain in my gut from the flu before. A few times it felt like somebody was trying to cut me open with a dull blade. So, This weekend I am doing absolutely nothing except laying around, maybe watching the races and trying to eat a little something, so maybe I can get back on my feet.......again!

Shaggy

A question

I was in hell for too long today, lets just say I thought a few more times of walking out and not looking back. But as I was laying down, attempting to rest after dinner, a thought popped into my head. Is it possible to beat someone to death with their own tongue? Not that i would ever want to try and find out it just seemed like an interesting question at the time.

Shaggy

A partly fun day

I woke up later than I thought i would this morning. Good thing there wasn't anything I had to do today. I watched most of the Kolchak Night stalker marathon on the sc-fi channel, I think I skipped one or two of them.

We went over to my aunt's house for a cookout, and were there for about 5 hours. I spent a few minutes wondering if i could sneak off with my cousin's Harley, but I think he would have noticed. After we ate I almost fell asleep setting in the one recliner before we came back here.

Not much else to say. Just tired and bored. Thinking about how I would rather not go to work tomorrow. I lost count of how many times on the drive to work I wished I could just keep going straight south and not make that left turn that leads to the paper. But since I don't have money or gas enough in the truck that idea would only get me as far as the Michigan/Ohio state line......maybe.

Shaggy

Why did i get out of bed???

I wasn't really feeling all that great when I crawled out of bed at 7:00 this morning. And by the time i was feeling better it was time to go out in the heat and head down to hell. Luckily I was only there about 4 hours as it was more of the typical bullshit, different day. If it wasn;t for what little money I make, I would have walked a long time ago.

I don't know what the temperature got up to today, but i'm still setting here sweating and its almost midnight. When I left that little place one of the girls walked out with me and she gave me a hug. She is going to turn 19 tomorrow, so I was generous and gave her a little kiss on the cheek. Then I told her to remember that it was just for her birthday and not to make any big deal out of it. That one is always fun to pick on.

I tried to rest a little bit after dinner, but I had too many stupid thought rolling around in my head i couldn't get comfortable. I hate it when that happens. So, I ended up falling asleep for a few minutes watching Family guy reruns. Or maybe it was during the Scooby Doo and the legend of the vampire cartoon that I was watching. Anyway, I hope I can sleep some tonight, without thinking too much about how certain people should be skinned alive and have their tongues removed. Always such happy thoughts...........

Shaggy

Sunday night

Well this was a not so busy weekend for me. Saturday morning went to town to by some food, which is always a good thing to do. Saturday afternoon I ended up sleeping in the chair for a couple hours. Managed to wake up in time for dinner. Saturday night I watched cartoon network for a while while skipping over to the truck race on speed channel. I also watched part of the Attack of the sabretooth movie on sci-fi channel. Why did i do that? Does anyone know how to write a movie that doesn't turn out to be a waste of film anymore?

This morning I had thought of going in to look at some airplanes, but I stayed home because I wasn't feeling the greatest after I woke up and I didn't feel like wasting the gas. I went the last couple years they had this fly in breakfast thing and saw a few old biplanes and such. They even had one seaplane, which according to the tag on the side said it was the same plane that was used in the old series Tales of the golden monkey. I used to watch that show, but fail to remember anything about it.

Tonight I am going to watch the new episode of Family guy. After that I probably won't watch anything. Unless I watch the mummy returns for the six or seventh time. I've been trying to come up with ideas for a new self portrait drawing. But my last three ideas all revolved around a stick figure in a mask. Not sure if thats an idea I want to go with or not.

I was reading my horoscope in the new tv guide and it said something about cutting off some friends and being more private and keeping to myself. How much more private can I be? Short of locking myself in my room and never leaving. There are some days that I feel like doing just that, but if I did that my best friend would kick down the door and beat me senseless until I gave in and gave her a hug or something. She can be a nuisance like that sometimes. But, she is the best friend i have ever had, so I can live with that. Sometimes its hard to believe that its been almost 7 years since we met. Will be in september.

Its another hot day here. So, i've got the fan right next to me, but its not helping too much. I hate it when it gets hot like this. But when it does get warm I do sometimes tend to sleep better. I slept over 5 hours last night, and for another 3 this afternoon. Sometimes it seems that I can only sleep if I stay up until about 1:00 a.m. or so. If I go to bed anytime before that I am usually awake at least two or three times at night.

Shaggy

So bored

Today wasn't too bad of a day, considering I was in hell for almost 6 hours. The job I was doing today was boring. I managed to help out with a couple other things while standing around making sure the machine kept running kind of steady. The little bald guy mentioned how we were doing so good we were keeping up with the press while it was running off the paper. I told him thats because he wasn't over there screwing things up. So, he ran right over there and the machine happened to jam up. He fixed it, and then just before it got all the way to the end, the paper he fixed jammed up again. I just stood there clapping.

I watched Bullitt last night, first time I have seen the whole movie. I've seent the big car chase two or three times, but never the whole movie. It wasn't bad.

Probably not doing much of anything this weekend. Except maybe sleeping. I slept for about an hour after dinner, but barely that. Last night I managed to sleep for about four hours straight, first time that has happened in a week.

Shaggy

Out early today

Got up at 6:00 a.m. this morning to get ready for work. Listened to my new Judas Priest cd before I went. It was a boring morning and we were all done before noon. Came home and had some lunch then went back to town to see what new comics came in at the hobby shop. It was either that or fall asleep in the recliner.

So, now I have the rest of the afternoon and night to kill. Probably won't do much of anything. I may set at my drawing table some and work on the project I started the other day. Its supposed to be kind of a portrait of my best friend and I as simpson's characters. Or some close resemblence to them. I hope.

Shaggy

Wednesday

I left work about an hour or so early today. Started to not feel too good. But i'm feeling better now.

Not much to say tonight. I went out after dinner and picked up the new Judas Priest cd. I have had their song "Revolution" stuck in my head for two weeks now, so I figured i might as well go get the thing.

I saw a t-shirt I liked today. One of the gals at work bought it. It had a picture of a bulldog on it with a tail sticking out of its mouth. And in big letters underneath it said "Kitty? What kitty?"

Shaggy

Almost over

Soon my four day weekend will be over and done. I'm so not looking forward to going to work tomorrow. Unless my best friend is there and can take me to lunch like she was mentioned last friday before we left. I could go for another fish dinner at the restaurant we like to go too when we can afford it.

I managed to set at the drawing table a few times the last couple of days. That was good. I trashed two ideas and worked on three more. I also finished the poem my friend asked me to write for her and got a copy of it in my wallet so I remember to give it to her.

I had a copy of the J. Scott Campbell Danger Girl sketchbook on my pile of comic books. I looked at it not too long ago. It was still there when the shelves and the books went into the other room. I have looked for the last three days and I cannot find that book. Its not in any of the piles of comics, or with the pile of photography magazines. And its not in here anywhere. And it didn't get mixed up with my mother's craft books. I have no clue where it is.

I could have went and picked up my check today, but I didn't go anywhere. I can get it when I go in tomorrow. Tonight I will probably flip around the channels and see whats on. If I turn the tv on at all. The last three or four nights I haven't turned the tv on at all after 5:30. Its been a long time since I have spent a night without the tv being on.

Shaggy

Part 2

Here are a pic that I took at the show this morning. It wasn't really that big of a show. I was there for about 90 minutes and saw everything at least 5 times. I saw a guy I haven't seen since one car show in may of last year. It started getting really warm, so I left to come home. I would have posted these earlier, but just when I thought of getting online a storm went through, so I had to shut it down.

The 4th.....Part 1

The only good thing about today is I don't have to go to work. I am only on for a moment, had to get on and find out when the car show started. I wouldn't have had to get on at all, but all the papers were trashed the other day and I couldn't remember what time it started.

So far the sun is shining. But I think they are calling for rain. So I am going to the show early, so maybe I can beat most of the crowd. And get home before lunch. I may miss something going that early, but oh well.

Shaggy

Sunday morning

Just finished lunch after going to town this morning to buy some groceries. I dug out my little electric scooter and rode around town for a couple minutes before lunch. Picked that up at a garage sale last summer for $150. The guy even delivered it, brand new still in the box. Had to assemble some of it, the only thing is is that it only goes about 12 MPH and can maybe go 10 miles before needing to be charged again. But its fun to putt around on. Still half asleep as I only got about 4 hours sleep last night, the nascar race was rain delayed so it didn't end until about 1:40 a.m. or so.

Drove past the park where they were having a motorcycle show, and didn't see enough there to bother going back this afternoon. Still thinking of the car show, which I am pretty sure is tomorrow. And on that note, here is a list of cars I really like:

'66 GTO
'65 to '67 Mustang
'65 or '69 Camaro
'63 split window Stingray Corvette
'71 'Cuda
The GMC van they used in the A-team series (not sure what year that was)
Dodge Charger like the General Lee(whatever year that was)
'57 Chevy
'34 Chevy
'32 Ford
'50 ford F100 truck
And too many more that I can't think of them all right now.

Shaggy

Just another friday night

Today was a long day, even if I did have to only work about 4 and a half hours. The only good part about it was I had a nice chat with my best friend. Except for the interuptions by the little bald guy when he came around and screwed things up. And telling her she wasn't paying attention when the inserting machine would jam up, when he knew that she was doing everything right. Pathetic little troll anyway.

Sounds like it may be trying to storm again. I could be wrong. I don't know if its supposed to storm again tonight or night. Plus there are a lot of fireworks going off around town. They were going off at 1:00 a.m. this morning when I was getting ready to crawl into bed.

I've actually managed to start two new drawings. One is a kind of self portrait thing, and the other is for my private collection, which was inspired by something a friend told me. I picked up a tattoo flash magazine today to get some inspiration and there are a few good things in there. Like the special section on cartoon characters they did.

Well, it does sound like thunder getting louder, so I am off of here for tonight. I may go to a car show, or a bike show this weekend. Or I may just feel like staying home and doing nothing until I have to go to work next wednesday. Oh wait.....I have to go get paid tuesday. If thats what they want to call it.

Shaggy